02 Feb Things Divorce Experts Wish You Knew Before You Got Married
11 Things Divorce Experts Wish You Knew Before You Got Married
These tips could save your relationship — or at least help you bounce back if it’s ending.
Divorce lawyers, mediators, and financial planners get a front-row seat to all sorts of situations — from easy-to-navigate, amicable separations to crazy contentious splits. So it’s safe to assume they’ve learned a few things that can help couples between saying, “I do” and “I don’t anymore.”
2 Spending habits are worth discussing on a date.
The biggest factors causing divorce that Minion sees? Money and infidelity. “And very often, the latter comes about because of the former,” he says. “Money causes conflict. And then people often look at other means of satisfying themselves or coping — and that might include a third party.” Couples should have open communication about what’s coming in versus going out, as well as short-term and long-term financial goals.
5 You’re marrying your money, too.
6 Have your own line of credit.
“One of the most important financial recommendations I make to my clients is to be aware of their credit score,” says Samalin. And make sure it’s in good standing. “By having credit autonomy, you are assuring your ability to get a loan without your spouse.” You know, if things come to that.
Wanting to take him to the cleaners would be normal — but you probably won’t be able to. “In most states, marital misconduct — like an affair — does not entitle the innocent spouse to more assets,” says Davis. The money and property will be divided according to equitable distribution as usual. That said, you might be able to get more money in alimony, depending on the way the finances work out.
When meeting with divorce lawyers, people often want to tell their story, Minion says. “They want to explain why they’re getting divorced and to validate their reasons. But in realty, what brings them to court is irrelevant to the end result.” You’re paying too much to attorneys to try and hash out who did what or what you’re feeling in their office. The moral: See a counselor before you get to that point — and you have better odds of avoiding it in the first place.
We hope you enjoyed this article! It is a bit different from our other posts but we want to cover all aspects of marriage and real life events.
Also, can we just say, we’ve heard that divorce parties are a new thing?! I mean, celebrating new beginnings are great!