02 May How-to: Tolerate Future Monster In-Laws!
When getting married to your finance you are not only marrying that one person but your in-
laws as well and therefore, they will soon be considered your future family. Your in-laws
ultimately will be your part of your family and will take on the role as a second pair of parents
to you. This can be overwhelming and as the wedding day approaches many in-laws want to be
involved in all aspects since you will be marrying their child. Some in-laws may be easy to deal
with while others may be difficult to deal with. Either way there are plenty ways to deal with
them whatever the situation may be. We gathered a list of ways to give you excellent advice on
how to put up with your in-laws- to-be. Remember this is going to be your family so anyway to
please their wishes will go a far way.
7 Key Tips For Dealing With Future In-Laws
1. Make an effort with the in-laws
Marriage is all about compromise so making an effort to please your in-laws can set the stage
for them to welcome you into their family with open arms. By respecting the in-laws- to-be will
make them so happy that their child found someone as great as you to marry. They will grow to
love you and will clearly see the happiness that you bring to their son or daughter more than
ever. When making this kind of effort in-laws will be encouraged to spread kind words of you to
their extended family as well. Everyone in your future family will be more than excited to meet
2. Setting the boundaries
Yes, it is important to make an effort and to keep them included in the wedding plans however,
certain decisions should only be up to you and your fiancé. The wedding primarily is all about
you two anyway and what makes the both of you happy. In-laws are great voices when
providing advice and opinions but most of the final decisions should be up to the bride and
groom. Other boundaries should be set as well to avoid any drama that may arise during the
marriage. For example, if your fiancé doesn’t mind parents showing up to your home
unannounced but you do then the boundary should be set that you would like them to call
before showing up. So take control and set the boundaries beforehand.
3. Communicate with them directly
Communication should always be open between you and your in-laws. You shouldn’t ask your
future spouse to talk to the family if something bothers you, instead talk to your in-laws
directly. Approach your in-laws just like you would approach one of your friends. This will show
them that you care and want to fix any problems with them in the proper manner. By keeping
the communication lines open will essentially build a stronger bond between you and the in-
laws for years to come. When accomplishing this and showing interest in them will make them
eager to listen to your wants and needs way more than when going through a third-party such
as your husband or wife.
4. Negotiate the ideal role of the in-law
It is important to talk with your spouse on the role you want your in-laws to play on every
subject such as the wedding, the planning, within the actual marriage, when the holidays role
around, and especially when kids finally come into the picture. This can avoid issues that you
may find between your future spouse and in-laws. By setting the roles you two as a couple can
have your privacy when needed and the in-laws will be in your presence during those times
when you both need them to be the most.
5. If they don’t accept you, be humble and accept it anyway!
Don't be discouraged if the in-laws don't accept you at first it’s just a minor setback. It’s okay to
not be accepted sometimes as long as you bring happiness and love to their child’s life they will
eventually learn to love you through time. Once they see the love and strong bond between
you two will only force them to appreciate you. Acceptance can come later on and realistically
takes its own course to develop. As long as you two as a couple accept one another that's all
that really matters. By showing your in-laws that you are okay with not being accepted just
proves to them what a good person you really are by taking the higher road without causing
any family drama. Accepting this minor set back will all be worth it in the long run.
6. Never discuss any relationship conflicts with the in-laws
Make sure to keep any conflicts between your love relationship just between you and your
future spouse. There is no need to get other family members involved especially when it comes
to the in-laws. In reality no matter what the situation might be your in-laws will more than
likely take the side of their child over you since that is their blood and number one priority. By
keeping issues between yourselves will ward off any resentment that they may feel towards
you which is the last thing you need to worry about.
7. Making the transition into the new family!
Last but not least it’s time to make that final transition into your new family. At first it may be
hard and you could very well feel out of place however, eventually as time goes on you will feel
like a key member of the family. It is important to always make sure to respect them, to show
your appreciation, and to attend all family gatherings that may occur. By being in their
presence, the relationship between you and your in-laws will only grow a strong bond. It is
essential to treat them just like you would treat any member of your own family. Their door will
surely be open for you at any time and can defiantly make you feel more special than ever.
These are just a few tips to get you started on how to deal with future in-laws. So don't worry,
be confident and just show them how great of a person you are! Take it all in and enjoy their
presence as you exchange your martial vows with one another. Your future in-laws will one
hundred percent be referring to you as their son or daughter in no time!